Tuesday, May 3, 2011

The Balancing Act

As a Christian, I often feel torn between two conflicting ideas; namely, living by faith and living according to the practical standards of this day and age.

I was having this converastion with a friend last night over dinner. We were talking about some things that are going on in our lives, and at one point in the conversation, I said: "Hey, I'm a woman of faith, but let me tell you something--I got insurance!"

That line ended up being her new face book status. ;)

But all joking aside, at what point do we, as Christians, stop simply "believing" and start using the brains that God has given us?

Case and point: Do we as Christian women trust God to open and close our wombs? Or do we resort to contraceptives like birth control because our brains tell us we can only handle so much? Do we simply surrendur all and cross our fingers and hope we don't end up with a million kids? Or do we do we plan our lives within the boundaries of ordinary, common sense?

Maybe that issue's too controversial. Scratch that. How 'bout regular doctor's visits? Do we trust that God will supernaturally heal our sicknesses? Or do we take meds because we know He's also  given men insight into the intricate workings of our bodies? Do we take out insurance on our cars? Or do we trust that God will provide if we get in an accident? Where do you draw the line?

I honestly have no idea. How much is faith and how much is pure stupidity?

All my life I have heard pastors exhort their congregations to "trust the in the Lord. He will guide you." Until recently, I always interpretted that as some sort of mystical revelation. A voice in my ear. A prophetic encounter. Some news flash that would blink "encounter with God" in bright, neon lights. Unfortunately, it never happens that way.

Quite the opposite. When God speaks, He does so during the strangest times; times when I least expect it, or when I'm not necessarily looking (or listening). Like how 'bout smack-dead in the middle of washing dishes or taking out the trash?!?!

But the coincedences of my life, I'm learning, are not realy coincidental at all. They all have purpose. They all have meaning. And the few times I've been able to look back and have an "ah-hah" moment, it makes all my worrying (as verbalized in blog posts like this one) seem really--unintelligent. lol

Yet, I don't seem able to stop. My brain is just one complex network of tangled wires and sparks that go off without a mechanism to switch it off. ;)

For now, I feel like every Christian is walking a tight rope over an abyss of uncertainty. Or maybe that's just hormonal me mentally self-destructing. Either way, I think I need a nice cup of tea and some ice cream to settle this deep, theological query. ;) Sorry for the abrupt ending. But when you ask questions that you yourself can't answer...you end up like me! *twitch* *twitch*

Laughing out loud, :)

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