A few days ago my family and I were sitting around after dinner discussing--what else--cats!
Fyi...We own such a creature, and it goes by the names of (and I quote): Mocha, Moo, Precious, Precious Petunia, Baby, Schmucums [sound it out for yourself] Schmucum-face, and all manner of embarassing titles which I DID NOT sanction! Anyway, I hate our cat! Not because its mean, but because its stuck-up and endowed with far more attention than any animal has the right to receive.
But to continue...
My mom had been looking through a magazine we subscribe to, when she found a story about a two-faced cat. Literally, the thing has two faces, three eyes, and one brain. Here's the picture in case you don't believe me.
Our conversation went something like this...
Mom, who loves any and all cats, crying indignantly: "The poor thing! I'll bet no one would ever adopt it. But I would."
Dad: "You would adopt anything."
Me: "Yeah, like the tailess cat you almost brought home from the shelter."
Mom: "I don't love based on looks. I would totally adopt a cat with two faces."
Nick, who is at times the most inane, self-proclaimed "Moo-lover" of the house: "Mom, Mocha is two-faced."
HAHAHAHAHA!!!! The brillance of it. That has got to be one of the most accurate descriptions of our cat I have ever heard.
But the night was still young.
A few minutes later, having agreed to disagree, we got on the topic of dancing. Now for those of you who don't know, I've made it my life's ambition to teach my brothers how to waltz. I know some of you are laughing right now, but c'mon! I'm not the only girl who wants a guy who can whirl and twirl me into his arms. My brothers are great guys, but I figure I'll give my future sister-in-laws a little extra bonus! :D They can thank me at the alter! lol
Anyway, we were teasing one particular member of the family who can't dance to save his life! (Teasing is a regular commodity in this household!)
--Right! You? Can dance? Give me a break!
--Hey, that reminds me of the show "So You Think You Can Dance."
--Wouldn't it be funny if you changed the intonation of that sentence?
--Let's try it!
Here's what we came up with. And just for kicks, I'll act it out for you. Ready? :P
Ok, here's the phrase normally: So you think you can dance?
Now, licking my lips, I cross my arms with attitude, snickering: SO. You think you can dance!?
Change. Now I'm the skeptic cowboy in an old, black and white Western, looking you up and down in a voice dripping with challenge: So, YOU think you can dance, huh? (Let's see ya do it then!)
BANG! You're dead. Scene changes. Now I'm the teacher calling on you before the entire class. My glasses are perched on the tip of my nose, and I'm glaring down your throat with that smartly ridiculing look: So you think you can dance! (Well, thinking isn't everything, you know.)
Change. Now we're on the playground, and I've got my finger pointed at you as I'm doubled over laughing hysterically: So you think YOU can dance?
Change. I'm the timid girl who nobody thinks about, summoning up the courage to accept the football captain's invite to prom: So you think...you can...dance?
Change. We're standing in a dark, deserted alley in the heart of NYC. It's two in the morning, and I say, rubbing my chin with my fist: So you think you can...*side long glance to my buddy standing next to me* dance?
The End. *bows* *curtsies* *catches bouquet*
Thank you very much, I'll be here all week! :D (10 points to whoever can tell me what movie that line is from!)
So yeah, just a little insight into the happenings of our home-life. And now that I've officially made a fool of myself, I'll bid you a charming adieu! :)
Hope you guys are having a great evening!